Thursday, October 19, 2017

Heart to Heart


I am sorry for that time we fought so long and loud that the neighbors wished us condolences the next day, for that time we fought in late afternoon and the sun refused to feel warm on our backs, for that time we felt the entire house shake from the fury in our voices. I am sorry that you felt the need to walk out and it wasn't even anything I said, that we both bled all over the kitchen for absolutely nothing, that we had to bend and break before we could heal.

Honestly though, I do not regret it at all. I am thankful that we were able to gain battle scars from a battle actually worth fighting, that our war was for love and not hatred, that we are better off for it - closer than we've ever been before. I am grateful that we had this chance to get the steam out of our heads, that we could clear our minds and patch up our hearts all at once, that we figured it out on our own - it just took more time than we (or anyone else) expected. 

Wednesday, October 18, 2017

Not Needed Anymore


You were right, I don't need anything from you -

not the skype calls at one am
or the poems written in vague language.
I don't need your voice coming
across wires when all I want to do
is fall apart all over again.

And I suppose you were right when you said

that the walls only start talking once
the trouble maker fades away, but
you weren't the troubled one at all.

All spun like sugar and aged like wine

you were just a sense of poison
I wasn't able to name yet. Like
hemlock or too much lavender tea.

Hun, I can't tell you why you're still

captivating my heart and on my mind
everytime I turn around, even after I
swear I've moved on (for real this time?)
So I won't even try this time around,
but I do wonder what it would be like

to need you all over again.

Tuesday, October 10, 2017

New Face in the Mirror (Sort of)


Look here change is nothing to shy away from, and until you realize that you will never be as truly you as you (or the rest of us) deserve you to be. 

Monday, October 9, 2017

Roll the Dice


I will never see your face or be able to pick your voice out of the crowd outside, but I think that's why I've chosen you to read my story before anyone else. 

Wednesday, October 4, 2017

Tuesday, October 3, 2017

Learning as We Go


It's not the mistakes I mind, it's not even having to clean them up after them, it's not putting my best foot forward from the getgo. But if this is how we're going to play this out, then let's go arm in arm, without any fear because if nothing else this is the best way to get experience and knowledge under our belts. 

Monday, October 2, 2017

Little Blue Hearts


If you'd like to remain frozen and die alone then I will gladly leave you to your impending misery. But you know as well as I do (hopefully) that that's the kind of life no one can be satisfied with. 

Sunday, October 1, 2017

Complete Honesty


You have only ever been a geek dressed in tinfoil.

But no knight in shining armor could have been any sweeter.

Saturday, September 30, 2017

Butterflies and Cheetahs


Would you say yes if I asked you to run away with me?

For All the Stars



This one is for all the stars that

burned too brightly, too fast,
or simply so hot that even
the sun was jealous.

You will be remembered,
even if you had no names,
and you will be forgotten
as though you were never

anything more than a simple
gust of wind on a spring morning.

But please do not fret Darlings,
your ghosts will be used to
fuel more fires and stories than
you can possibly imagine.

This one is for a star named Jarred.

Who has been missing for two years
and while everyone else has moved on,
burried your lifeless body, and ignored
the rumors from the city
about your disappearance,

I've moved to Los Angeles
and someday someone is
going to make a movie about you -

telling only the truth.

This one is for all the stars that
burned too bright, too fast, and
may have even made the sun jealous. . .



* What a note to end suicide awareness month on?

Friday, September 29, 2017

The Beauty of Kindess Rivals all


She weeps daisies while her tears
wash out the names of battles
that steal away the loved ones
ever so effortlessly,

she carries guns loaded with Peace
and sunlight while her hope brings
rationality and compassion to this
war-torn heart of a battlefield,

she holds on tightly to her heart
and wraps her soul in fresh bandages
each morning without fail.

And soon she will single-handedly
win this war. 

Thursday, September 28, 2017

Greatest Days of All


Let's go and explore the world around us. We can call it adventure and storytelling all at once, let's go have the greatest night of our lives so far. And next week, we can try to top this one!

Wednesday, September 27, 2017

Stanzas Heal More Than Bandages


I need a friend. Right now.

Not one with flesh and bone, but one with a poetic tongue drenched in honey and midnight.

Please find these words and write to me. Not about what might be wrong, but about beauty and joy.

I need a friend. Right now. One who can remind me how artists see this world. 

Tuesday, September 26, 2017

The Circus Travels Through Hell


A myriad of pages remain safe homes for your sacrilege.

Ink weeps for its own misuse - for baring your name.

Past conversations linger upon shattered airwaves.

And we walk along a frayed tightrope, yet again.

Darling, you were right about an angel kissin' on a sinner -

only our roles were reversed, like always. 

Monday, September 25, 2017

Roses and Shadows Bloom Together


I have gardens thriving in my veins
fertilized by the ashes of too many
unspoken goodbyes and watered by tears.

The ghosts of the people I never got
enough time to love, rent out space
in my heart and tend to the thorns
so my wrists stay sewn shut this time around.

I am made of olive branches and
goddamn heavenly roses tended by angels

and from now on Sorrow

has no power over me.

Sunday, September 24, 2017

Purple Fades so Fast


It's been a while since I've worn the ring you gave me, but I have it on today and the sky tastes just a little sweeter than it has in a while.

I wonder if your days have gotten any better since my ghost stopped by to say hello over a cup of coffee. 

Saturday, September 23, 2017

Cataclysm Unlimited


If the world is going to keep ending at the drop of a hat I hope you understand we will survive for eons compared to the dinsasors and aliens.

Friday, September 22, 2017

The Fridge Speaks only in Heartbeats


If our love letters were reduced to stick notes, those few sentences will be more powerful and shocking and beautiful than anything novelists have ever penned. 

Thursday, September 21, 2017

Too Shattered


Darling, you haven’t been okay a day in your life. There’s no use lying to yourself when somehow - miraculously - you’ve come this far.

Wednesday, September 20, 2017

Fairytale Living


Dance with me, here, tonight. Beneath the faded pink glow of fairies pirouetting across their dusky garden stage, alongside twinkling stars spilling and holding secrets with us the way waves do with the shore, atop a stained carpet littered with good intention. Darling, we can be anyone or anything we can dream, if only you'll dance with me, here, tonight. In this makeshift land of hopeless romantics and half remembered ideas.

Tuesday, September 19, 2017

Cold Coffee


The silence fades as our laughter bubbles. It fills the whole room beautifully as tears dry and fights come to a stand still. Your eyes shine even in this dim light. Smiles spread, paper devours ink. Time must really fly when you're having fun, I completely forgot about my drink.

Monday, September 18, 2017

Warum Nicht?


I know you're the spilled coffee on my pages. You're the pause after the sigh. You're the ink in this pen.

And I know, without any doubt, that you played a major part in me becoming who I am right now.

But I am going to keep going on. With or without you, because I see no reason to do anything else.

Today I am happy because, well, why not?

Friday, September 15, 2017

Hyperbolic Mirrors and Windows


Do you remember when I told you about being young and spending entire weekends - entire summers - at the science center in my city? I'd spend hours in the planetarium and then I'd run my fingers through the discarded corpses of gravity's fury (dominoes that hadn't been stood up or fallen either).

Well, I don't know why, but today I wondered how much I'd weigh on Jupiter and if Mercury still waves to my "home" town every night through cheap binoculars. But then, after a while I began wondering if I ever really thanked all the friends I made for the private star shows or the impromptu lessons about sun spots and telescopes.

If you and I can keep orbit long enough, I'll take you back there someday and together we'll see if the magic's still there when life has already coxed us into growing up and learning how to forget the importance of science instead of the value of math or English.

When I was young, I spent far too much time in the science center making friends with information and falling in love with the people who took their time to teach me anything I wanted to know about space or gravity or anything else the world had to offer through experimentation and far too much time spent questioning before the day I came along to wonder the same thing.

And I don't believe I ever had the chance to thank everyone who inspired me to take my love of poetry and mix it with all the nuggets of knowledge, beauty, and truth that they armed me with before I knew art and education would become enemies on the same side of a crooked ass war.

But I hope that if we can stay in orbit together long enough, that you and I can go back there, to that science center in a town I hated for far too many reasons and that you and I can share these works mused from all that time I spent in a building that became more home than my own house of twelve years, and together we will make that center so fucking proud that even the walls learn how to cry. 

Thursday, September 14, 2017

Writing as We Go


Darling, you only have so much story to tell before your words lose their shape and form.

Please keep some safe for my return.

Wednesday, September 13, 2017

Let's Master Life


Go on an adventure, get lost in a city you've never fully explored, take friends of go by yourself - it makes no difference. Just go somewhere, and do something to show this world that you truly have lived even if it was just for a few days a month or a handful of moments each year.

There is nothing better than making mistakes and creating beautiful moments now only to have better stories for sharing when you are older. 

Tuesday, September 12, 2017

My heart Thinks too much


My heart wishes it had hands of its own
to write out the things my brain
overthinks before allowing the ideas
to hit the page.

Which is funny because I remember
at one point I hated computers
because they ate my thoughts
in a way that was so much more cruel
than the alcoholic's behavior of
the page towards the ink
coursing through my veins.

So I suppose I understand how
she feels being there, all trapped
feeling things that cannot be described,
beating to a tune that has not yet
been recorded or played.

My heart has so much to say
and voice to express it.

Maybe, just maybe, if you
hold me close enough,
you'll be able to pick out
the messages through morse code
or patterns in the beating.

Monday, September 11, 2017

New Bridges to Cross


You never know where Life is going to take you, but I have to say, I’m so glad I went out on a limb and spent that afternoon chatting with you. 

Sunday, September 10, 2017

Still Holding On



And now, even after everything, I can close my eyes and see two little girls running in the street singing Taylor Swift songs in the rain and dancing in the parking lot of the office building my mom worked in for so many years so long ago. I can hear us giggling the night away as we wrote about all the people we wanted to be someday and how we were going to change the world, but maybe just the neighborhood if we fell ever so short. Everyone still asks how you are, I smile and say, "I hope she's doing well enough," even though anything is better than what you had when we fell through. Really, I just want you to know that you're the kind of friend that is remembered forever and always, the kind of friend to forgive without forgetting. One of those artist types whose works tattoo your heart even from the miles or years away.

P.s Happy Birthday!

Friday, September 8, 2017

Little Things Add up


I still remember giggling at the back of the biology classroom and the way your silver ballet shoes (the bracelet you wore) sounded whenever they danced along the pages of one of our notebooks. We didn't have the time to do all the things friends should do together, but the memories we do have and the time we did enjoy is more valuable than all the normal things I've shared with others. And even though we haven't seen each other in a few years, you're still one of the most important people I've ever met, so happy birthday Darling. I hope you make the moments of today count in ways the hi-lighted celebrations won't be able to touch. 

Tuesday, September 5, 2017

Fighting for Breath


Tea just isn't hot enough
or strong enough this week

and the hospital isn't an option
this time around the bend.
So instead I've made friends
with the sheets of my bed
and hot water, lemon,

and a few drops of honey

to get through work
before coming home

to die again.

Well, maybe, death's not
the real answer, it's just
when you're as sickless
as me, and you're coughing
up more mucus than your
tiny little body should
be able to hold

every single moment

feels like you're

fighting for breath.

Monday, September 4, 2017

Remembering Two Years Ago


Thank you for visiting. I hope you had as great a time as we did. Let's do this again soon, okay? Especially now that we're on solid ground again. 

Sunday, September 3, 2017

Planet Poem



What if life as a human really began with each of us
blowing as a gust of wind on Mercury -
before becoming bacteria on Venus,
then humans here on Earth.

Wouldn't that mean that death here's not really
the end of anything at all, it's just the first step
to our journey as Martians atop the red planet.

And even though that's the end of time in another,
very different body, that's not the end yet either.
Cause after that we go on to become storms on Jupiter,
the very ancestors of Hurricanes Katrina and Sandy
or earthquakes in beautiful places. Then we hula hoop
the rings of Saturn as if we are Star ballerinas and actresses.

On Uranus we course through unexplored,
nameless oceans before becoming Neptune's tears
and Pluto's goodbyes. But even that is not where
Time himself fades away because there's still

so many millions of miles
left in space for us
to explore and enjoy.

Saturday, September 2, 2017

Say Yes

 

Everyone's looking your way, just waiting to see what you have to say and how you feel about this. I've gathered the attention of strangers and friends alike, the moment is beautiful without even trying. Now, here comes the scary part, here's where the nervousness kicks in, where the shaking starts and my voice begins to get too quiet to be heard; but I have to ask this anyway because I'm just so completely overwhelmed with joy and bliss and magnificence - I was wondering, I'm just curious, but would you like to spend forever with me in some silly, fun kind of way?

For Tara Kay and Amy. 

Friday, September 1, 2017

Friends Across These Wires



I don't want to ever forget how light you make my heart feel.

And I hope to remember how much sweeter my days with you are than the days without you. 

Thursday, August 31, 2017

Support Systems


And if you are brave enough to stand beside me there will never come a moment you will stand without me next to you. 

Wednesday, August 30, 2017

Leaves and Pressed Petals


And when it's long past due to break from the grey, when you find rain within yourself instead of around you quenching this drought too long I will suggest one thing for you; listen closely, you can find me; I'll be your sunshine, I'll make you laugh from the inside out then when I get you smiling enough to join you, together we'll light up the room and the world - when sorrow wins let me be your purest known bliss. Because an old, tattered or dim appearance has nothing to do with what lies beneath the surface protected, from the skeptical glances from the rest of mankind. 

Monday, August 28, 2017

Something Fun to Celebrate

Hello everyone, I am back full swing and I have some great news to share. I have just (literally in the last hour sort of JUST) finished a recent poetry project. It is a contest manuscript of 35 original pieces. If you would like to have an authentic first copy (there are 15 up for grabs) and to support what might happen to the collection once the contest is over, head on over to Patreon and pledge for just one month - August to September or September to October, and you will receive a personalized and signed copy of this manuscript in the mail!

And if you are already subscribing to Learning to Fly on Patreon you have an even better surprise coming your way in a week or two!

I am so excited to share this adventure and first taste of accomplishment with all of you!
If you need the link to patreon: https://www.patreon.com/Learningtofly
on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/SomethingWithMeaning

Postcards From Riverview Park


I will continue to ask you to stand tall in my absence, because if you can then I will be more proud than I've ever been before. You see, Love has a strange plan, but you will always have a home in my heart. 

Sunday, August 27, 2017

To Celebrate This Homecoming

I will always dread the days you have to leave me, but hey, guess what.

When you come back home, the sun shines just a bit brighter and the amounts of laughter we share talking about your trip make up for every moment you were gone.

I'm so glad to have you back!

Saturday, August 26, 2017

Coffee Shop Greetings

Sometimes,  just being open to meeting new people - new friends, is enough to make your day brighter than you ever imagined.

Friday, August 25, 2017

Simple Note of Return


Life does have a nasty habit of getting in the way of our other habits and hobbies, but you should know without a shadow of a doubt, I'll always find my way back here to and for you. 

Tuesday, August 15, 2017

Fighting for Breath


Tea just isn't hot enough
or strong enough this week

and the hospital isn't an option
this time around the bend.
So instead I've made friends
with the sheets of my bed
and hot water, lemon,

and a few drops of honey

to get through work
before coming home

to die again.

Well, maybe, death's not
the real answer, it's just
when you're as sickless
as me, and you're coughing
up more mucus than your
tiny, little body should
be able to hold

every single moment

feels like you're

fighting for breath.

Friday, August 11, 2017

The Glare of Moonlight


Just because the waves are coming into shore

does not mean the kelp and seaweed will

lose their grip and come along for the ride.



Much like the ocean, you and I

will ebb and flow with the patterns

of each other, but we do not have to



say goodbye to our roots



just yet. 

Friday, August 4, 2017

Powerful Joy


Let's be something so beautiful and so memorable that we help the world shine, even through these unusually dark summer days. 

Thursday, August 3, 2017

Innocence Offered to the Gods


Trying to be soft,
learning to work.

I'm undoing your
tender heart.

Undressing anything
you might apologize to.

Even bare naked bones
aren't enough for you. 

Wednesday, August 2, 2017

Footprints and Farewells


The first time I ever went to a beach
I wrapped the name of another around
my tongue but dared not speak it
as I ventured on with their sister and
my own mother ( her's as well in a way).

Which I suppose made his name taboo
in one way or another, but that is besides
the point now; I am here to tell you

about the first time I ever went to the beach
and how I sat there watching the waves
pull away footprints of people who left
before we arrived and I heard the sun
laugh along with groups of prettier girls than I.

Now that I live close to a beach,
the waves are still taking away the sand
I got in my shoes all four years ago
and along with that sand they tug at
the letters of your name and the colors
of your face. Which is not to say that

you have been replaced by that other name
forked like barbed wire or a burning pitchfork,

simply that times change and somehow
the ocean remains the same despite
swallowing unsaid goodbyes whole.

Tuesday, August 1, 2017

NaPoWriMo #7 2017 Forget About Tomorrow

There are no tears I'm wanting to cry,
but there's still not enough coffee in
the world to drown me deep enough
or keep me awake for everything
I have to do tomorrow.

Saying goodbye even for a few days,
kills me, and even though you've got on
a brave face, like most boys your age,
your eyes show pieces of you falling away.

So for now, let's build one more
pillow fort and play stuffed animal
dodge ball, like when we were young,
I'll even let you scout for materials first.

Then we'll have at it,
little to no rules (except
the obvious, no breaking stuff)
and when it's all over,
the winner (you) gets
any lunch they want.

Mac and cheese?

Or have your tastes changed since
the days of Saturday morning cartoons
climbing trees just for the perfect pictures?

Either way, it doesn't matter,
lunch is on me, so that the coming
goodbye, godspeed, see you soon,
won't be so bad, so it won't

cut so deeply. 

Monday, July 31, 2017

Wednesday, July 26, 2017

Here's to Moving on


I'm not sad when I say this, because I'm happy now too, but I'm glad you've found someone who can make you outshine the sun the way you made me rival the stars. Congratulations, and if you guys want to go out for lunch sometime, there's a great new restaurant on the corner of 1st and Rose. 

Tuesday, July 25, 2017

Poetry about a Poet's Poems


Everyone's got this story
in their own voice, but 
few of them can word 
it as beautifully as

 you. 

Monday, July 24, 2017

At the Station's Mercy


As the radio plays and the songs slow as they shift from one to another and you make your crazy little jokes, look at me in your weird ways, dance along with poor tempo, and strange patterns. These are the moments that will live on even when we can't. Although it does make me wonder what your favorite song is today. 

Saturday, July 22, 2017

Beautifully Young Instances of Friction


It's not the hotel sheets that make our story so lovely. It's the way everyone else backed off and let us live for ourselves.