Thursday, March 31, 2016

Godspeed, Hun

Darling, I woke up and got ready on time, I even ate breakfast.
But we were out of coffee and sugar, so no caffeine for me
and my ride was late, so I stood in the drizzle for ten minutes.
Ash stayed home "sick" and mom's still out of work -
not that you ever knew much about them anyways.

Hell, do you even remember my name or who I was?
Do you remember the countdown or drawings we crafted?
Was there even any reason you left so silently -
is there any explanation for the lack of goodbyes?

Hun, this morning I woke up and thought today could be good,
I took a shower and felt beautiful in my "grunge".
Then I got to school and my mind gravitated towards you -
so godspeed hun, 'cause that's what you said, isn't it?

Tuesday, March 29, 2016

First Swimming Lesson

I just need a moment to get my feet under me again. So please understand it's not that I don't want to be here for you tonight, I just don't know how to juggle quite as much as you.

Monday, March 28, 2016

Our Share of the Band-aids

You can no longer break that which is already broken. So face your efforts upon healing what can still be saved. 

Friday, March 25, 2016

Travel the World

I asked you if you need anything else to make your stay any more comfortable but never caught your answer. so, i am on my way back with the brightest star imaginable and the calmest seas. I just hope that they make you as happy as you make me. 

Thursday, March 24, 2016

What Rachel Ray Doesn't Know

All it takes is a deep breath
and a little sunshine
coming straight at you.

That's all you could
ever need. Beauty
surrounds you
while dreams bathe
you in all their

Just one moment,
a little light, and some
hope - it's the perfect
recipe for relief. 

Monday, March 21, 2016

Trippin' on Alice

Interested in drinking tea
goddamn tea pouring down
but different - I'll explain.

Too fast like talking to the piano
and then the end jerks off.

Everybody was gorgeous,
she was dark grey.

I know she knew something
was funny - phony even.

A masterpiece - absolute angels
thinking of somebody and their name.

It was time then -
time for drinking tea.
Goddamn tea pouring down.

Sunday, March 20, 2016

Mascara Stained Sheets and White Lies

Maybe you weren’t ever there because you didn’t want to be; maybe you just couldn’t. Maybe you didn’t know how to make it up to us - how to be there every day working 9 to 5 just to keep the lights on when you were used to fighting and seeing the world as a means of keeping us safe.

I tell myself you’re not here today, being the person I always deserved because you just didn’t know how to be. That way I feel less unwanted and lonely on the days it’d be the nicest to have someone like you around. 

Thursday, March 17, 2016

Happy Freedom Flight

I decided to do this so you would be happy. To give you wings and an empty sky.

Enjoy and know that I will always love you.

Happy Birthday Sweetie!

Tuesday, March 15, 2016

Shedding Skin

Let me grow up enough that I know who I want to be before you ask me if I am sure of anything. 

Monday, March 14, 2016

Witness Me

We all search for meaning in our own climates-

Some of us require the solitude of a starry night
while others need the beautiful chaos of coffee shops
and train stations. Light and shadow play into our visions
like hope and despair battle for our attention -
each and every day.

We all search for meaning in our ways-

I just hope your inspiration is a muse more glorious
than I could be for you. Speaking of that,
I’ve gone on to be someone else’s muse -
all grown up and long since moved on
what brought you here?

We all search for meaning in our own forms-

so do be careful taking your words from another
like you loved doing to me. 

Saturday, March 12, 2016

The Science of You

If you are willing to turn your body into an entirely new planet, I promise to map every hill and valley of you before I die. I will create the new age almanac for average rainfall when you skin your knees versus when you are heart broken. I promise I'll name every single strain of fauna and flora, blood and bone, within you and dedicate my entire lifetime to researching their evolutionary tracks. I will learn everything there is to know about this new planet of ours so that when I'm gone and somebody new ventures across you they'll have footsteps to follow.

If you are willing to turn your body into an entirely new planet, I promise to donate every moment and fragment of my life to science. 

Friday, March 11, 2016

I'll be Gone

I'd be like you, (careless enough to cut myself on angel hair and baby's breath), but I actually like making mistakes when there's no one left to learn from.

Besides, this heart-shaped box of yours is more of a home than anywhere else I've ever been.

Don't worry, my advice was only to meet yourself before following my footsteps, because this nirvana, this bliss you offered me is better than any chemo out there or these pills.

There's no need for goodbyes or tears, you won this game years ago Sweetheart.

Thursday, March 10, 2016

Artistic Habits

Can't you see, I'm rotten.
I drink alone
leaving behind nothing

but a beautifully
unfinished note.

Wednesday, March 9, 2016

Through the Woods

I won't tell you that it's dangerous to keep wandering alone, because it's not if you don't believe so. But honestly, I'd really, just rather to be here for you than not to be.

Tuesday, March 8, 2016

Such a Rare Cycle

Darling, this rain song of ours, these thoughts of chaos blooming like roses, the way you remind me of stars dying and being reborn over and over again - everything about it makes getting out of bed each day so much more than worth it. 

Monday, March 7, 2016

Scream Another Promise

On a bleak beach you find
a piano the tide has stranded.
You hit it again and music
rolls distant over the sand.

The beautiful
. . . never
. .go far...

Sunday, March 6, 2016

Forever In My Mind

Broken hearted butterflies swarm the faded sunset as fallen angels fall from just outside Heaven's pearly gates. "Jump from the Golden Gate Bridge or from the top of the Empire State Building. Don't worry, it'll be alright." That's what everyone said to me, until you told me to run, to run from the beautiful monsters, from all the worded shrapnel and their unbreakable spells. I was a walking skeleton, a mechanical squirrel and you were a prince - a king waiting inside the castle. We were the perfect strangers keeping each other together inside a shattered world.

Until you introduced me to happiness as we spoke over coffee and cream of wheat one Sunday morning. 

Thursday, March 3, 2016

Reaching for Stars the Human Eye Can't See Yet

If you're searching for hope then you have to stop dwelling on the bast before you can really see the depths of your findings.

Wednesday, March 2, 2016

Back in Full Swing

I know that you're probably wondering where I've been lately, but things have been sort of chaotic.

Maybe you needed a break from me. I can be a little bit too persistent sometimes - I'm sorry if I've been annoying you.

Please forgive me.