Left Turns Only

Fate so cruel in her wicked ways

what makes her so important

in the grand scheme of things anyway?


Threads unraveling, paths unclear,

what I did I don't know, but this is real

Mass Misunderstanding and Graves

Anarchy might have taught you, but she never did have the heart to care about you.

Youth may have bullied you, but he was just jealous of the light in your eye.

Love probably missed you, but if only you'd have been patient she was handcrafting your soulmate.

Poor Faith, was your friend in school, she didn't deserve this kind of behavior either. 

Following the Road

Remember to collect memories, but sometimes the souveniers are too heavy to make the trio home. 

Party Time!

However you choose to celebrate your little victories, make sure there is both joy and responsibility. 

Not about the Results

Sometimes all you have to do offer is your best foot forward. And I'm okay with that, especially if we smile along the way. 

Still Bubbly About Cappuccinos

Just because we've outgrown the iconic pajamas and our back yard is less scenic doesn't mean we can't be as close (or happy) as we were on your birthday five years ago. 

Flowers Wilt Twice as Fast

Forgive me, Darling, but I'm writing
about you again. You've been
in my system all damn day long.

Anyway, I was driving today,
along the California coast
and the gulls cried your name.

Then I passed a cematery
littered with balloons, so I
got to wondering how your's looks,

which led me to kicking myself
because I haven't been by
(it's the least I could have done.)

Shine brightly where you are,
I'll see you again soon -
even if the distance grows. 

The Smell of Lilacs in January

Another year has passed and tides have turned,

I've lost another set of lovers' souls, and time

moves so much faster with each month gone.


Words unsaid will be insignificantly forgotten

as promises unkept burn with remembrance,

coffee tastes bitter no matter how you doctor it -

like orange juice and toothpaste mixing again.


Maybe this year I'll finally move on,

get up and get out of these ruts I've formed

chasing after your ghost. It'd be nice to have

a fresh start somewhere new, even with him

I am reminded of you: how you pushed me away.


Another year has gone to the grave

buried beneath memories no one thought

twice about saving, six feet under

letters started but never finished and

envelopes addressed - not sent.


I'm doing much better out here,

I learned how to walk on my own

and I'm not falling as much (at least

that's what my therapist says).


But the smell of lilacs drifts in the breeze

finding its way to me, still leads me


to asking myself


how you


might be doing.

Tripping Over Future Apologies

We'd all be spoiled rotten if there were more heartbreakers like you. 

Cockatoo Feathers and All

With you, I spent my summers
pressing flower petals between
the pages of my red leather diary
and wearing feathers from your
pet bird in my hats and hair
(which were really your hats - I know)

The vivid yellow of her headfeathers
matched your personality
the same way I matched wildflowers.

We spent rainy days singing
and passed sunny ones reading.
Coffee was a must and so were
cupcakes (for every holiday).

With you I grew up and
embraced my inner child -
without meaning to, you taught
me about living life blissfully -
triton cockatoo feathers and all. 

Walks Along the Beach

Take your time. Finding yourself is a big deal. Just know I'm here if you need a hand. 

We Bleed Together

Just so you know,


I am just as selfish


as you are.

If not a million times


worse.

Turn This Way

Everything

. . . always

boils down to

. . . perspective.


But a dragon

hugging fish

by the elephants

. . . at the

wild animal park


does sound


so freeing.
    

Sunday Senryu

(Yes, I know its actually closer to a haiku)

Trend Setters Only

Judge me only after you've learned to see yourself for all that you truly are. Flaws and successes alike. 

Strawberry Short Cake

I'd tell you that strawberry shortcake is my favorite sweet treat,
but it's related to midnight games of memory while mommy
was on valium for her pain and he was supposed to be just
"helping out" around the house for a few days.
And if you were anyone else I might say that it's fried bananas
with ice cream and chocolate sauce but that takes me back to
the time we danced in black and purple in front of the whole school
I wasn't even attending - it reminds me that our dates stole each other.
Or maybe I would pick icees and skittles because of the way
we battled summer heat in the south as we walked out on
everything that made our young hearts so angry only to find
ourselves making out in the park by the pond.
But every time a waiter asks me if I'm interested in dessert
for that evening, I have to shake my sorrowful eyes no
and ask for the bill instead. I'd rather go without sweets
than cry more than I have to in public places.

Spirit of Wealth

As I watch these crystal drops fall

they remind me I have no need to cry.

A year ago when I lived in the desert

my tears were the only flowing water, all else was dry.


Though I watch now intently

as the Universe takes my old job away.

I feel as though I 'll never cry again

for I know my smile will forever stay.


Even my soul can hear the songs of freedom

and my heart sees the graceful dance of joy.

My cries for relief of my once undying pain were heard

I will forever be happy, with or without some boy.


I trust my future and believe in it all

cause now that I stand so tall I rule myself.

The wind whispers a story for all to hear,

it speaks of happiness and internal wealth.

Farewell Serenade

Last night after everyone else went to bed I called your name out to the stars and I danced through the living room with your ghost. It was my belated way of saying goodbye and I feel lighter and more complete now.